Okay. Maybe I exaggerated. A little. Really, Maxim? Really? You expect me to believe that you found 38 women that are more hot than Kate Upton? 38? After taking a look at your 2012 Hot 100, I have to believe that payola or seeing eye dogs have to be involved in this farce of feminine hottness. Rihanna? Dirty skank...yes. Hotter than Kate Upton? Really? Taylor Swift? That anorexic Big Bird...hotter than Kate Upton? Blake Lively? Kristen Stewart? For F's sake, if you keep this crap up, I swear I'll find another magazine to fap to!!! I'll do it, damn you!

Take a look at the evidence, Maxim, and tell me truthfully that you think Emma F-ing Watson (Geezus...she looks like a 12 year-old boy) is hotter than Kate Upton!!! With a straight face, you pieces-of-s#@*!!!! I'm sorry...did I just say that out loud?!?!?!?