Over the years, we have seen the Olympics do the same games over and over again.  According to ESPN and the Independent Online there is a movement to get Pole Dancing as a an Olympic event, which got me thinking, what other Olympic events could we create that would show off our exceptional ability to do what we do best.

In the USA, we like to drink and we like to party...how about the Jello Shot-Put:

Events would be judged on the following:

1.) Hang Time: A talent that not everyone can do. If you have cleavage, you can make this happen. I'm sure you are thinking that men can't do it. You would be wrong. Even men with Moobs can do this. Low points for this, as too many people can do it) ( maybe 5 points)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2.) Pose and Posture: Since everyone at a Jello-shot party has a camera, you gotta look cool with holding your favortie colored shot.  You don't want to look drunk, nor do you want to look like you aren't having fun with your friends, so this should require lots of points. (10 points)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3.) Presentation: When Jello Shots are present, how are the Jello Shots presented? With Style? With Class? In a stripper outfit? Since it has to do with no natural ability, let's go with low points (5 points)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4.) Lesbian Tendencies: Exclusively for the "female doubles" tournaments. This is important. When people get smashed on Jello-Shots, things can either get sloppy or things can get interesting. Because the line is so narrow between the 2, high points for this. (10 points)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5.) Am I Over The Limit: How well do you handle your liquor? This could be anything from anger to crying to the classic "I Love You, Man" (5 points)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

6.)The Cleavage Retrieval: This one is important. The whole event could be for "not" if you screw this up. (10 points)