Jack White is a what?!?!?!?  I've heard him called one on numerous occasions (like here, for one). But the Jack White I know is an ARTIST, a MUSICAL GENIUS, and therefore has a legitimate right to certain eccentricities, right?

The man in this song can't be the same guy that sold out Municipal Auditorium a few short weeks ago, right? This can't be the man that enthralled the thousands packed in like sardines to hear him sing those amazing songs we know and love (I myself, don't know...I left before the show started. I, not unlike LeBron James, thought it was way too damned hot in there. But I digress)? Songs like "Dead Leaves and the Dirty Ground", "Fell in Love With a Girl", "Seven Nation Army", "Icky Thump", and "Steady as it Goes"...this song can't be about him, right?

According to Jack Kennedy, the man behind Jack Kennedy and the Douchebags (who recorded the song in question),

"It's in no way about the actual Jack White. It's a fictitious character whose name is also Jack White who frequents Los Angeles yoga studios, and who I've heard is a total douchebag, but it's not the same Jack White. The coincidences are just really remarkable."

I'm thankful for that, because a world in which Jack White hits on girls in yoga classes, assaults cab drivers and has a huge penis, is not a world I want to live in. That being said, enjoy the song. I know it will be stuck in my head for weeks, and I sure don't want to suffer alone.